*Deep Down

Information:

• Source: Hello World Notebook
• Key: F Major/ D Minor
• Measures: 48
• Parts: Cello and Piano
• Duration: 3:16 Min
• Pages: 4

Art has always had this habit of showing people what they don’t want to admit about themselves

NOT TODAY #

I’ve seen a lot, but I haven’t seen it all. Still, I’ve seen enough to know that religious and political extremist are the ones who get obsessed with having full control over everyone else. And when they do, they usually end up creating and sometimes magnifying the exact thing they were trying to crush. The problem is when they start using physical intimidation, that’s when things get a lot messier.

But here’s the think: just when they seem ready to clamp down by building some pure, disciplined, moral world, someone in six-inch heels, a blond wig, and glitter walks onstage to a Whitney Houston song and says, “Not today.”

A SATANIC SHOW #

Take Madonna’s Blonde Ambition tour back in 1990. Pope John Paul II called it “one of the most satanic shows in the history of humanity” and begged people not to watch it. I was 19 years old in 1990, I knew who Madonna was, of course, but I was not a fan, until John open his mouth putting Madonna’s music and what her art stands for in my radar. The irony!

Yes, I remember that some shows even got canceled because of the uproar. But did Madonna back down? Nope. She just kept shining. She spent years making the religious right lose its damn mind just by existing in public with confidence and good lighting. The harder they tried to shut her down, the bigger she got.

FIGHT THE REAL ENEMY #

Two years later, the singer Sinéad O’Connor tore up a photo of that same clueless John Paul II live on Saturday Night Live. She wasn’t just being edgy for the hell of it. She was calling out the Catholic Church’s ugly secret… the child abuse scandals they tried to hide. But wait, isn’t hiding criminal activity a sin?. I guess not, because is not written in the 10 commandments.

For centuries, the Vatican’s hypocrisy has always been overwhelming. That night in the set of Saturday Night Live, everyone went silence. Afterwards, the outrage was massive, but that moment cut through the bullshit like a knife. It’s raw, painful, and honest. That’s the kind of punch-in-the-face truth art can deliver.

JOY, STYLE, HUMOR #

On the other hand, drag shows will always be a good example of resistance. I can’t watch one like it’s just another night out. I know for a lot of people it’s camp, comedy, makeup, music, and a reason to drink overpriced cocktails. And sure, it is that too. But it’s more than that. When I see a drag performer own a room, I’m not just seeing a performance. I’m seeing someone take all the rules that were meant to shame people and turn them into a joke.

I don’t wake up every morning looking for ways to offend some priest, politician, or idiots with a podcast. It’s just that there’s something completely satisfying about seeing joy, style, humor and wit flourish exactly where some people argued it had no right to exist.

TWIST IT A LITTLE #

I think about comedians too. Not the lazy ones who confuse being offensive with being funny, but the ones who know how to put a knife into bullshit and twist it a little. George Carlin did that. Cliff Cash is still doing it. And so does Wanda Sykes. Even someone like John Waters, who built a whole career out of bad taste, style, and refusing to act respectable for people who were never going to approve anyway.

Jimmy Kimmel got suspended recently after calling out the current U.S. corrupt administration. The network caved to pressure, but the backlash against that suspension showed people aren’t ready to let entertainers be quiet just yet. And before that, Kathy Griffin got into serious trouble for publishing a photograph holding someone’s orange head full of blood. She survived and still being as critical and inappropriate as ever.

TEXAS, YOU CAN KEEP #

And then there’s the Dixie Chicks. In 2003, after Natalie Maines said she was ashamed that George W. Bush was from Texas and didn’t support the Iraq War, the band got radio bans, boycotts, and public hate thrown at them like they’d committed a crime. Not thinking that the criminal was Bush. But they kept going. They kept singing. They didn’t shut up just because some people wanted them to.

Punk exists for a reason. So does queer pop. So does every singer, band, or performer who got called disgusting, dangerous, corrupting, satanic, or whatever dramatic word people were using that week.

David Bowie played with gender before a lot of people even had language for what they were looking at. Freddie Mercury made being larger than life look effortless. Lil Nas X turned outrage into part of the performance and basically said, if you’re going to clutch your pearls anyway, you might as well choke on them.

PAINTING PAIN #

Painters and writers have been in this fight forever. Francis Bacon painted bodies that looked twisted and haunted. Egon Schiele made people uncomfortable with his raw, naked honesty. Caravaggio gave saints the faces of real, dirty, street people - making holiness look human. How dared him!. Andres Serrano took photos that made people so mad they couldn’t look away. Writers like Margaret Atwood have had their books banned because they dared to imagine a world that scared the hell out of some folks.

Art has always had this habit of showing people what they don’t want to admit about themselves. That’s why I don’t buy the idea that all this content is just corrupting society. That line is old as hell. Every generation has some group of joyless freaks insisting that music, sex, clothes, dancing, books, paintings, drag, comedy, or women having opinions will bring civilization to an end. And yet civilization somehow survives another drag brunch. Incredible.

ART DOES THAT #

In the late 1800’s a lot of people I am sure rejoiced, when Oscar Wilde went to prison for his homosexuality, wrongly thinking that, that’s the end of that abomination lurking in the world. And yet, more than 100 years later, shows like Drag Race still exist.

It seems to me that the things I enjoy deep down have an edge to it, they have to make me think and allow me to formulate valid questions. Deep down what I enjoy doesn’t ask permission. It doesn’t bow. It doesn’t clean itself up to make authority figures feel smart or safe or important.

Drag does that. Punk does that. Some comedians do that. Certain films do that. Some books do that just by existing on a shelf where the wrong person can find them. I like that a drag queen can walk onstage looking more polished than the people condemning her.

I like that a comedian can tear apart fake moral outrage in five minutes and much better than a columnist can in a thousand words. I like that musicians and artists keep finding new ways to say: your rules are not sacred just because you said them loudly.

I’M NOT SURPRISE #

Maybe that’s what I enjoy most. Not rebellion in a loud way. Just the fact that people keep creating things in spite of all the pressure to be smaller, duller, straighter, quieter, more obedient, more “appropriate.” Jesus Christ!. That fucking word alone has probably done more damage than most actual sins. And to be clear, I’m not bitter. Bitter would mean I’m surprised. And I’m not surprised at all.

Of course there are still people who want to police bodies, pleasure, art, language, and identity. Of course there are still people who hear a joke, see a performance, or look at a painting and immediately think, this should be stopped. There have always been people like that. They’ve always been here. They are boring, but they are consistent.

DEEP DOWN #

This piece of music for cello and piano I have composed is a dedication to all the brave humans who, through their art, have taught me to resist and keep going. They have taught me to make the best out of each situation and not be afraid of actually living, because the dark amusement that narrow-minded people throw my way doesn’t last.

I have named my composition “Deep Down” and it might sound soft, but it represents the loud voices of all the artist who had exposed the lies, and the hypocrisy, and let’s not forget, the double morals of the world. A beautiful world nevertheless.

A LAST THOUGHT #

Because for all the sermons, campaigns, bans, warnings, outrage, pearl-clutching, and moral panic, people still dance. People still dress up. People still paint the forbidden thing. People still tell the dirty joke. People still go onstage. People still sing the song they were told not to sing.

And I smile. Not a mocking smile because I’m not better than anybody else. Not a healing smile because I’m not broken. More like: “well, would you look at that”. After all that effort to control everyone, here we all are anyway. Still making a mess. Still having fun. Still refusing to become these miserable bastards.

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Published Score.
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